Saturday, July 6, 2013

My take on being recently single

Enjoying singlehood once again.
Its kinda odd cos now ive been used to havibg someone with me to talk to etc but at the time i was with somwone i felt like i was a singleton. .identity crisis maybe

Oh for the record i wasnt being dumped,screw people who think so.
It was decision..the relationship was beyond saving already.though it being mutually decided,i'd say that the troublemaker was ehem yours truly actually..
So being this mischievous troublemaker..  he coulndt bare with moi anymore,and after i  tried making amends in hope to save the pieces of us left,still to no no point being us.he couldnt forget/accept what did,i oso cannot stand being sullen treated bye2 awak

Its also decided.i cant continue with sukma heart's not in it..i know i should have sucked it up and just go along with it..but its too painful lah for now.the fact that this isnt compulsory,i did it just for money so whatever mcm abh ckap the money bole cari tmpat lain..i hardly believe he said that actually but whatever screw this..

Sukma is not really a bad thing actually.lots of things ive discovered..about people,social handling skills..and that what horrifies me the most how easy crrtain men can make advances on u little lady juat bcos they are superior than u..its another reason im leaving..super-awkward..i dint think i can face this man who only known me for 2,3 days and make generous yet inappropriate offer to have me tidur kat rumah dia throughout this event..i 1st thought it was a harnless joke bloke always use to flatter ladies,lagi2 mmg salu kna mtk tolong ngan abg nih so tpakse layan je la in the most casual tak bmksud ape2 manner.turnrd out he's being serious.uh oh.. Super awkward.i know he's charming good looking but gila lah kite ni org islam.eventhough i was not in a good emotional state due to this pre-break up, but i was still in a sound mind not to layan bnda cmnih..tapi kna kerja ngn dia lg ni la buat awkward gila nih. so leaving is the best idea tak nak aku jumpa org cmtuh lg..

Banyak lg perangai manusia jmpa..yg rase pelik and significant cos me being me, i hardly have the chance meeting new people outside my study/work based.meaningnjrg la nk bgaul ngn org bukan nerd,science stream nih..lain prasaan nya.

So now emm..i just wanna dok the usual mourning stuff and all..stuff myself up with ice cream,sad breakup songs,sad movies (mcm atonement..nangis nk gila tgk cta nih)..i still need all these..i hope i can recover by the time of my practical..this raya wont feel the same..raya single la plak tahun nih.baru ja thn lpas jmpa auntie, auntie tnye farah bila lg..masa tuh tsyum malu aje lah, skang nih tbalkn muka la kot ckp baru breakup auntie.b4 puasa.oh pathetic gila it sound..crap nye da la kalau ikot turn ak skg nih..bila pk malaise nak mlwt sdara nih sbb soalan nih msti kluar :/

Kena enjoy being solo dlu nih..camna rasenya nak start all over again..rasa pelik..tapi i'll survive.skang nih bila tgk baby comel nak nangis ja rasa,lately ni mmg emotional skit..kalau ad jodoh,ade lah..kalau lmbat ke takde tuh sabar je lah farah ye :')

Skang in phase suma laki same je haha ampun lah kalau ad mamat mmne tbaca nih..ampun beribu ampun

Skang nih tgh dok je lah..layan..supposedly bas gerak ke MABA 11 am nih..dah gtau supervisor.en li was like ala awak nak ke nak pergi mmbawa diri dan hati nih en li hahaha..xd la ak jawab cmtuh..pndai2 la ckp emergency..tak sure abah boleh amek tak lpas zhur ni kt ktm..lepak dlu la memana,drop bag kt kl sntral..wandering around..tgok wyg ka..haha..kalau mngis dlm tu pun org xpasan kan :'(

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